Life tip: if you don’t already KNOW the answer is yes, don’t ask. It’s too early.
I had a girlfriend asking me like twice a week for a year- when I was going to propose and then I did and she said no.
When they ask you like that… it’s the cue o have a conversation on the F-ing subject. What are your hopes and dreams, kids, quick wedding or elaborate… you know… discuss what the future would hold together.
Once you have had those conversations you also know what the answer to a proposal will be.
We did all of that but then she decided she wanted someone who went to the same church, she told me maybe if I joined her church. Her church beat two children to death trying to expel demons. We actually separated after we couldn’t work it out
Sounds like you dodged a large bullet there
Yeah, life sucks and that experience sucked, but it would be much worse
Removed by mod
Wtf dude?
Can you delete this?
Everyone can enjoy my fucked up story but I don’t see why you decided to repost itRemoved by mod
… why?
Come now, do better.
damn, dick move mate, keep that shit for yourself homie.
When they ask you like that…
just so we’re clear here. When you ask someone to propose to you, you’re asking them to propose to you, there’s a place and a time for doing a haha funny this is actually not linear thought processing, for example you’re in a car, i’m waiting for you to pick me up so i tell you “run me over when you see me” that would obviously be a joke.
you ask someone what their thoughts on marriage are, if you’re curious what their thoughts on marriage are, the english language isn’t hard. If you have to do it multiple times, maybe you should probably, idk, ask more forwardly.
to be clear OP is probably a bit of a dumbass, but to be clear, it’s not their fault.
Like that… I mean in general when the topic of marriage is brought up in a circumstance that is not an obvious joke. And even when used as a joke it is something that should be taken as a queue to probe the subject… Verify that it’s not a joke hiding more. Some people are dumbasses but also some people think it’s hard to bring up the subject.
I once had a girl randomly tell me she wasn’t ready to get married. I was just like “uh, okay, I wasn’t planning to ask you”. What she really meant was she was cheating on me and wanted to break up.
That sucks… I’d call her a cheating whore… but for the same you might still be together… life is funny in a crying kind of way.
We are not. That took place a decade ago and I haven’t spoken to her since.
like, i mean it might be hard to bring up, but i’m going to be bluntly honest here, probably don’t bring it up if you don’t feel ready or comfortable talking about it, you can always talk about the fact you’re uncomfortable about it as well. That’s another option.
There’s always a certain level of what i like to call conversational formality that one should apply. In the english language we use words like, the and ah an a i me, and various other words to help describe the specifics of what we’re talking about.
You can say something like “i have a blue backpack, it sits on that wall over there, there’s something important inside”
or you can say something like “blue bag, wall, important”
they both convey roughly the same message, but the former has vastly more detail in it, and is substantially more comprehend-able.
In the same way that you wouldn’t say “blue bag” when referring to something specific, you shouldn’t say “when are we getting married” in lieu of talking about marriage, it’s just not formal, or respectful at all. Personally, i just ignore anything like that that people say, if they don’t want me to know specifically what they’re talking about it’s not my problem, they can prod more, or simply do nothing about it. I could always ask, but again, wasn’t my idea.
i don’t know why people dance around topics like this, maybe i’m just highly autistic or something, but it just pisses me off. It’s almost like my time isn’t worth utilizing to the point of having a real discussion, so instead we’re having a meaningless conversation that doesn’t have a defined start or end, with no expected results.
for something like marriage it’s literally as simple as “hey, so what do you think about marriage?” and you can go from there, which is even less confrontational than something like “when are you going to propose to me?”
Also just like don’t joke about such things if you aren’t prepared for people to take it as a hint
Humor is a natural defense mechanism for people. A relationship takes 2 to tango.
To me. They are asking you to propose. If they want to have a conversation there have the fucking conversation. Don’t play games. No one can read minds.
But it doesn’t matter to me either way. I don’t date. I won’t date. I’m done with dating. And I will never get married.
It’s not always playing games… some people also just come out and say it… others will mask it with a joke… but then the conversation needs to be had. Not always full serious… we need to talk… but this is a good cue. As the other poster said … for both your sakes.
Hope you are OK… don’t know how to read your “I’m don’t with it”.
cue, not queue …
Regardless of what they are asking, you should have that conversation for your own sake, not just theirs. Though I’d also argue that if you are going to get married, you should want to do it for their sake, too. And if you resent them for not speaking their mind, don’t marry them.
LPT: Don’t give queues that can be severely misunderstood, just fucking ask what you want to know.
*cue
*cue
Hehe … wait in line.
I had a girlfriend asking me like twice a week for a year- when I was going to propose and then I did and she said no
Trolling level champion
Or speedrun the rejection with a ring from Claire’s 5 for $5
I feel like the jeweler should have stopped him.
The customer is always right in matters of taste. He wants an ugly ring? Jeweler should try and steer him away… but if homey is dead set, get paid in advance and make sure they sign off on the design.
I mean to be fair 99% of those rings look ugly.
I’m with you on this - I think most jewelery is gaudy AF.
But eye of the beholder and all.
Yea, I’ve definitely seen “normal” rings that this one looks better than.
Yeah, but like… Bruh, are you sure she’s as into Iron Man as you are? I know it was your first date, but she’s going to have to wear this everywhere. She’s going to show it off to her friends and family and coworkers. This bright red abomination that looks like it came in a box of cereal, that’s going to cost at a minimum $50 thousand dollars. Are. You. Sure?
She could have always asked for a different ring. This ring wasn’t what was wrong with that relationship. it is hilariously awful though.
You’re right about that. I would guess that this ring is a strong indication of the underlying problem, though. Specifically, impulsivity and egocentrism and an unhealthy dose of obtuse carelessness.
I hate the way it looks, but I might not if I was in love with the person who gave it to me. I hope I wouldn’t, because tbh, I don’t think I could bring myself to ask for a different ring if someone spent 18 months salary on one for me.
in matters of taste
Oh my god I just felt my chest release slightly with a tension I didn’t even know was there.
I never hear the full sentence, people always just cut it off 5 words in for some reason…
peoplecustomers always just cut it off 5 words in for some reason…Fixed that for ya. ;)
I am always wrong in matters of taste. This is why I get other people to do all tastes for me. This includes my wardrobe
The only thing that is real is that ring
Customer: Did you do it?
Jeweler: Yes
Customer: What did it cost?
Jeweler: Everything
Who is to say he didn’t? He probably told him this isn’t going to work out the way he thinks it will, but Delusional Man said, “Bet” and gave him a bag of money.
Good point, you’re probably right.
Also look at the amount of people just in this thread who got some lord of the rings prop or whatever and loved it - women not being a homogeneous block of feminine virtue actually have their own opinions and taste, they are to the shock of many here actually just people and are often dumb, tasteless, and obsessed by things like marvel or that one fantasy book that got popular.
Jeweller was* probably like ‘oh another client wants something ugly for their nerd wife, well at least it’s not disney ip this time…’
*yes I acknowledge this was almost certainly made by a nerd jeweler as a show piece and nor brought by oop as a wedding ring.
Yeah, this reminds me of the time I asked a hair stylist for a mullet and she refused. Also, a good tattoo artist won’t tattoo something that offends their sensibilities.
Jeweler was right to take his money.
Sure, he made the ring as asked. But it’s conceivable to me that the customer only talked to one person about his plan, because any sane person would have tried to talk him out of it. And the jeweler could have made a different choice, and then maybe he would be making anniversary rings, or rings for her jealous friends. Instead, there’s a viral image with his stamp on it, and I just realized this is all probably fake anyway. I’m not a smart man.
Best case scenario then. The mark and the conman both pay
I’ve got a friend who’s a jeweler and if he’s asked to engrave something where there’s a typo he won’t say a thing, he does it as is and keeps a copy of the original to show the client if they come back, it’s not his place to question them.
That’s a shit jeweler just begging for less return customers.
Ain’t gotta make a big deal of it either. Just ask, “Okay so you want, ‘No ragrets’ engraved?”
That sounds kind of petty to be honest. I’d just send an email or leave a voicemail and wait a day as long as I can still meet whatever deadline I had set. Everyone makes mistakes and it seems like it would be hard on everyone involved to have to do it over again.
If it’s a name, then yeah I wouldn’t question them though lol
i will never understand that stupid craze about expensive engagement rings… i engaged to my wife without a ring. It was just a very emotional situation, i was sure that i wanted to ask her… and then i just asked. No ring, no special event planned out or something… just asked her, and she said yes.
People paying cars worth of money for a ring is so unbelievable for me.
I gave my wife a ring made out of coconut. Cost me $2 and she instantly dropped it off the balcony if the resturaunt we were at. The Thai owner of the place climbed off the balcony into the boulder field underneath and spent 20 minutes looking for it. Even after I explained that it was only a cheap coconut ring. He said the price isn’t the point, it’s the memories!
He found it, what a legend.I carved a wood ring for her, and she was surprised I popped the question after I was carving it in front of her and sizing it against her finger
Thai restaurant owner is right: it’s not the cost—it’s the memories.
“Once upon a time” an expensive engagement ring worked as a sort of bride price and was a hedge against the risk of premarital sex.
How does buying/wearing a ring prevent premarital sex?
Back in ye olden times, you would pay a bride price to the parents of the bride, both symbolizing the eternal debt you owed to your wife and as a way to show you had plenty of money to spare to take care of your wife. You would then give your wife a dower, sonething they could hold onto in case you lost all your money or she became suddenly widowed. This historically was property but became rings or jewelry with expensive stones. The wife would take the dower as a sign she would no longer need to worry, and in exchange be a maiden on her wedding night. These practices were only for the wealthy, until indistrialization brought the practice to a growing middle class. Then, in the early to mid 1900s, marketing campaigns began associating the price of a ring to the love you felt for your wife, leading us to today.
Now this is capitalism.
I still don’t see how an expensive dower would prevent the couple from having sex before getting married, but I guess I’m just too modern-minded.
It was more for the woman to not sleep around or sell her virginity.
That seems so much less likely to happen than the couple sleeping together themselves.
Doesn’t prevent it, but gives the girl collateral if the guy breaks off the engagement afterwards.
Diamond rings are basically worth fuckall for resale. Most pawn shops won’t even take them
Back when my wife and I were still dating, she found a cheap ring she loved. It was just a normal jewelry ring with her favorite stones in it, not a fancy engagement ring or anything. But she loved it so much, she told me that if I ever proposed to her, she gave me permission to steal it from her and re-present it as an engagement ring. Which I did.
I felt bad about it though. I took the ring to propose, but my plans fell through and it took me a few more days to arrange a new proposal plan. She had forgotten all about our conversation, so the whole time she was tearing the house apart, looking for her favorite ring. She loved that I “found” it and gave it back to her with a proposal.
I got my fiancee a gold cat bell instead of a ring. Granted it was a bit pricey but it has special meaning to us and it was definitely not worth cars amount of money like some people spend.
Plus it’s harder for her to sneak up on you now
The real benefit.
I got mine cat ears and she got mad at me.
I gave my wife Nenya, a replica of Galadriel’s ring from Lord of the Rings made by WETA who are the folks that did the movie props. Silver and cubic zirconia ost $75. Mine was $14, wood and platinum. We’re 9 years in and going strong.
The one my husband gave me is Nenya without the stones. It’s just the 6 petaled flower in white gold.
Such a pretty ring. She’s the bigger Tolkeon fan of us two, so it also meant a lot to her.
The industry programmed everyone to pay silly amounts for a ring.
i’m fine with this shit if it’s interesting, or you have the disposable income to spend on it, but outside of that i feel like things that are more immediately sentimental are more interesting.
though to be honest, i find marriage kind of cringe, i would only ever do that shit for the tax breaks lmao.
sunset, silver ring. cost me about $20.
Good news! This ring also comes in fuchsia pink with piss yellow sapphires:
JFC, does this guy specialize in making rings that look like shit?
I feel like even calling this a ring is an insult to actual jewelry
There’s some fat guy named Art Masters who wonders why everyone is so critical of his jewelry.
Super Princess Peach FTW!!!
What’s fucked up is I DO actually like this one, minus all the random flush set bullshit on the sides
When you want a ‘no’
Holy crap, I looked at Art Masters Jewelry and eew. They are all clunky overdone nigh unwearable, some of the black ones might be good for a dramatic goth look - they look like costume jewelry but are priced like real jewelry though . So ugly.
I like some of the ‘nature inspired’ ones
I like the black and purple ones, but mostly yeah
yella rubies glistenin like PISS
Gulping seamonkeys by the gallon, my tummy feel crazy
Looks like a ring R. Kelly would give to one of his… Groupies…
Guy must be really poor because this looks like something that cost 20 bucks on Wish.com.
He didn’t say what he made in 18 months. He might just sell Santa themed toilet seat covers during the holidays and isn’t aware of how to advertise.
Okay so here’s a tip that I didn’t need to be told because I figured out of my own. Ask her what she likes. If you don’t want to do that for whatever stupid reason, then casually point out a ring you saw and ask her what she thinks. There are subtle ways to handle it. “I saw a wedding ring that used a sapphire, what do you think of that” or “hey look at the ring in this picture I saw online,” then listen to her opinion. If you do that a few times she might start to actually realize that you’re going to ask her to marry you and give you useful feedback, assuming she doesn’t state something useful in the meantime, such as “diamond would be better” or “I like that design but not the gemstones.”
Of course if you haven’t talked about that kind of thing already, clearly you’re doing something wrong. My fiancee knew I was going to ask her to marry her, just not when or how. Well she figured out on the day that was coming because your girl is almost certainly better at picking up on subtlety than you are, especially when it comes to you.
We did something like that. We both had talked about getting married, so we were both on the same page (this is very important). We both went and looked at rings, decided which we’d want and which sizes fit us, then I bought them and asked the jewler to engrave the date of the proposal. The wife wasn’t allowed to see, obviously, so she only knew that it was going to happen *someday * but not when.
The date went great and she said yes. Everyone happy.
I recommend my colleague to do the same. He did not. Now he’s trying to return the ring which is both too big and wrong style.
Over heard it says that the engagement itself should never be a surprise, just the when and where.
Oh and I’ll add in to listen to her if she says she wants/doesn’t want something specific. If she doesn’t want it to be a big public thing, then don’t propose on the stadium fan-cam. If she likes hiking, do it while hiking (but not somewhere the ring can fall in a river or off a cliff). Stuff like that.
I found out i was getting married when my wife asked, “is it weird i am looking at engagement rings?” I was like, “haha. I guess we are getting married”.
my wife asked
Whoa, you were really slow on the uptake.
if you haven’t talked about that kind of thing already, clearly you’re doing something wrong.
Yep. There are some cases where you should know the answer before you ask the question. Proposals are one of those cases.
I don’t even get how it’s iron man 3 themed? The Mk 42 was mostly gold
This looks more reminiscent of the suit he wore at the beginning of Iron Man 2
Maybe that’s why she said no.
I can’t marry this man! He doesn’t even know his iron man suits!
My first date with my husband, we went for dinner. I’m not going to want a broccoli themed ring. This is just odd. If she was a big iron man fan, perhaps it would work but just seeing a movie once isn’t that. This speaks not just to bad choices but a lack of maturity and understanding each other. Probably good she said no.
I made this to commemorate your first date with your husband, will you marry me and wear this on your finger forever?
I think its based on the chest reactor?
I don’t know what you’re talking about. Art Masters Jewelry is amazing. Just look at this masterpiece:
More of them here: https://artmastersjewelry.com/product-category/engagement-rings/
It is pretty, but:
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Colored rhodium is garbo, that plating will wear off faster than you’d think. Regular ass white rhodium is already the most expensive precious metal, 1 gram suspended in plating solution is nearly $500 COST. I’ve literally never heard of a store having anything other than white on hand.
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ALLLLL of their products are only represented with 3d renderings. This is a HUGE red flag. If someone isn’t even bothering to have physical models of their products made, they have no way of guaranteeing the quality of those products. It looks snaggy as fuck, and it probably is because they never actually made one to try on!
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Jesus christ imagine wearing that thing. The tongues on those snakes would be fucked IMMEDIATELY. The spikes on top of those prongs would get absolutely ruined in between ripping apart every piece of fabric you moved it near. If you ever need ONE prong retipped you’ll either have to lose the spikes on all of them, or just deal with them mismatching. That WHOLE ASS HEAD is so atypical and seated strangely that even IF you managed to wear it for years, long enough to necessitate the kind of general maintenance all jewelry eventually needs, you’ll end up getting shrugged at and told “yeah I don’t know how anyone could work on this”. Even IF you got someone to work on it, that finish is gonna need touched up, which is AGAIN, something no one outside of the manufacturer will do for a reasonable price. There’s not even a good way to strip off the existing rhodium, so you’d end up with black shit stuck in all the crevasses.
I think they’re very striking, but I swear to god y’all, my store will get at least one flyer every week from some new manufacturer with a line EXACTLY like this. Buncha whacky way-off-the-beaten-path design choices, there’s no actual pictures of anything, and the markup is frankly embarrassing. Regular ass jewelry stores like mine could have this shit custom made as a complete 1-off for LESS than what they’re selling it for, don’t buy jewelry online folks 💖
Holy balls, I didn’t even zoom in to look at the prongs on that serpent ring. That’s the kind of design made by someone who only ever designs shit and never has to work on the physical product. It looks cool but no one will ever bother to attempt to recreate that if they need to do maintenance. Plus I could easily see the little circles just, bending off and OOP, there goes the stone. There’s a reason prongs are designed the way they are.
Fucking design nerds 🙄 and I say that as someone with more design experience than practical experience - but at least I fucking listen to actual bench jewelers when I do my CAD work.
you’d end up with black shit stuck in all the crevasses.
Crevices. A crevasse is a deep fissure such as in a glacier.
Yeah but crev-asses is funnier.
Hey, I have a jewelry question totally unrelated to the post I’d like to ask, if you don’t mind. I wanna do a custom articulated ring for my fiance (I know, please hold your applause for my incredible taste). Is this a design I should work out with a jeweler, or do I need a machinist first, and then a jeweler to pretty up whatever they come up with?
Coming from a jeweler’s perspective I’d say always start with the jeweler, but I may be a bit biased hahaha
Even if they can’t come up with the design you’re looking for, hopefully they can at least explain the limitations for such a design. From there you could have anyone with an eye for mechanical stuff take a crack at it. If you could get a 3d model of all the parts, modern casters will just print it in lost wax and cast the parts for you. Ideally the jeweler sets that up for you.
The biggest expense should be the casting. Gold is the highest it’s ever been right now, I’d recommend 10k yellow or 14k white for the strength. The actual assembly will probably be a little pricey, but a good jeweler will work out a cost by pricing individual welds and whatnot. “Assemble this custom one off ring” sounds like it should be a hugely expensive thing, but if it’s just 5 welds and a couple hinges, realistically that would only be a couple hundred as a repair job.
When I finish her ring I’m gonna get one for you too. <3
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That would be incredibly inconvenient to wear, but I don’t think it looks terrible.
Yeah I mean come on, this is absolutely stunning /s
That ring is going to drug and rob me and be gone when I wake up in the morning
I know thats right.
Well yeah that one’s ugly.
thats gonna hurt Like hell, look at those sharp edges.
Jfc
So, my husband is a jeweler. We recently started our own business (mostly repairs right now). These things are largely poorly designed and way overpriced for what they are. Plus, there’s a lot of bullshit like “14k black gold”, which isn’t a thing. It’s possibly 14k white or yellow gold with black rhodium plating, which will wear off in about 2 years and need replating. And there’s one with a 1.5ish carat diamond and a few melee marquis, with no other detailing or anything particularly interesting other than the “14k black gold” bullshit, and they’re trying to sell it for over $10,000 usd. Fucking LOL. This site is trash.
whenever someone brings something to our store with worn off black rodium, we’ll do the regular clean/check/polish and then just use an industrial black marker to fill it in. we don’t charge for it, and it’ll actually last a long time if it doesn’t see heavy wear!
the alternative is spending at least $400 for something you’ll use like 4 times a year. PLUS you’ll have to charge for it, and no one wants to pay for a full rhodium just to replace what is most likely a single tiny accent of their jewelry hahahah
keep at it with the repair work, that’s the lifeblood of a good jewelry store. people like the store they bought their trendy new ring at, but they LOVE the store that made their old ring new again.
Ouah… 138 pages of rings ? I’ve only checked a few and didn’t find anything I found nice.
Won’t waste more of my life to see if there actually is though.
What the fuck are these things? 🤦♂️
Who is more pitiable? Him or the woman who dated him?
The people who believe it
Are you saying people would tell lies?! On the internet?!
No, I would never say something like that!
Shhh, you’re ruining my fun.
I just had this thought where what if it wasn’t a real date, like she went on a group outing and he concocted this whole thing as a “romantic gesture”?
Maybe I’m reading too much incel lore.
yall know you don’t need to buy these things right?
Go find a funny rock or two somewhere on a stream, it’s as good as any ring, except you can’t wear it on your finger, which is probably good anyway.
Even if you want a ring, we got wooden rings. Cost like $100 for some really nice ones with fire opal inlay from an online craftsman. I’ve already cracked mine a little by being a dumbass with heavy car parts so I’m just ordering another. It’s cheap, and on top of that if I had dropped a brake rotor onto a gold or metal ring it might have gotten flattened and trapped on my finger. The wood just cracked a little and flexed right back into its original shape.
If I had a lathe and some motivation I could even make my own, but I’m happy paying the relatively modest price of a single Benjamin for a well crafted ring with inlay.
I got a tungsten and wood ring that has went through hell and still looks great
yeah, there are always some interesting ideas, even something like a solid stainless steel ring would arguably be pretty interesting. A little boring, but interesting nonetheless.
Keep it in your pocket
In your pocket?
this is certainly one of the options.
I got my husband an engagement watch. It’s an analog watch with a 24 hour dial, and it was very hard to find. He was delighted (especially since the ring he was getting made for me was delayed by about 4 months because of Covid)
that’s cool, i’m a fan of analog watches in the mechanical sense, mechanical contraptions are one of the most fascinating human developments of all time.
Doubles as a neat collectors piece, and gift as well!
Will you marry me and wear this awful thing on your hand?
It looks like a giant whitehead pimple lol
I never would’ve seen that without your comment. Now I can’t unsee it!
Biblically accurate Iron Man.
Many versions of the Bible have sadly censored the mentions of Iron Man over the years.
Which edition should I read if I want the uncensored edition?
I mean, it’s at least worth the value of the stones and the raw materials of the band if it’s recoverable without it all being red. But that is some “Holy Autism, Batman,” levels of understanding what women, or any halfway average person would want.
I like this therefore you must also like this.
They just wanted to recreate Iron-Man 2.
