Worse, he’s a businessman

My brain autocorrected the first three I read. I felt like I was missing the punchline, so I started over to notice.

As the dude who wears loud clothes every so often, to the total chagrin of my partner, that compliment you have was the payoff from a dozen “that’s ugly” vs a dozen “nah it’s dope”. Thank you for settling the debate. Lmao

They’re not empty, they’re full of possibilities

Why tf do I keep seeing posts about boycotts and protests the day they’re happening

Sometimes I go to the bathroom solely to wipe the sweat from my asscrack/taint. I call it Operation Sweaty Bunghole. This is the first and only time I’ve ever discussed it outside of my own mind.

“May the best daddy win”

1. Take control of the system
2. Abuse the system until it breaks The system no longer functions, as expected. This prevents the system from leaking revenue
3. Claim this broken system is unnecessary junk
4. Remove the junk
5. Repeat as necessary Logical conclusion: total destruction of money leaking service sectors without firing a single person. Avoid payouts related to severance because everyone “quit.” Save any costs those services were spending.
6. Profit

Yo I just noticed they have little bro canines! He a meateater!

The Spire? Send me there, that I may Slay it by throwing my deck into the void and making it spontaneously explode.

Y’all play Tactical Breach Wizards?

Post-modern-apocalypse dnd Cleric with a “Christianity for Dummies” full of receipts

Paladins tryna long rest in their plate

What makes you think other prone don’t?

At this rate they’ll need to define and standardize what constitutes a dildo so they can ban the right things. At what length is a dildo dangerously concealable? Do fully vibromatic dildos need to be more strictly controlled? Is a cucumber a dildo, or an AOP (Any Other Phallus)? Should doctor’s offices hold dildo buybacks?

This movie was so good, and this scene is peak.

It’s not the mirror, it’s their reflection in the ipad screen

I bet a few of your holes could accommodate two of these buddies

Do you also complain about movies being staged?

Rhe most absolutely cursed thing I’ve ever posted in Teams was 👁 👄 👁 in the org main chat. The mouth is tilted 45°, all the emojis are huge, and weirdly animated. It was very funny.