Sofia “Buff Girlfriend” @sofiabuffgf
Installing a bidet at home was life changing but unfortunately it’s transformed pooping on company time from a small proletarian victory into yet another grueling humiliation of inadequate working conditions.
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Portable bidets are great for work!
With my pocket bidet, pocket pussy, pocket watch and pocket knife, I’m officially pocket-challenged.
What an amazing day to have eyes.
https://www.humangear.com/shop/p/bidettoob
This one is cheaper and probably easier to use base on nozzle design.
Doubles up as a water bottle w/straw included!
Using just toilet paper is like if a bird shit on your arm and you used toilet paper to wipe it off. There’s still shit on your arm - you’re still dirty and need to wash it off. Bidets are really superior in every way.
Yeah that don’t track. I poop on company time and walk away with a pampered butt thanks to my bidet. Feels fantastic and clean.
I think they mean when they’re in the office
Exactly. Unjustified RTO is basically a crime against humanity.
And our buttholes!
I relate to this on such a deep level. I really dread using any toilet that doesn’t have a bidet now. I can’t figure out why they aren’t everywhere . It has to be better for the environment.
Imagine the filth in your average public restroom.
Now imagine if they were all designed with powerful fountains that spray water up and out of the device if not intercepted by an anus.
I’m pretty sure “this is why we can’t have nice things” is true in this case, just pre-emptively.
Go for a portable one. Be clean and proud. Nobody is gonna ask you about the flask-thing anyway unless they want one. https://www.happypo.de/ No idea if it has a translated site, but it’s quite butt-forward anyhow.
We have those in the US as well. They’re meant for women who just gave birth to clean their privates. The hospital gave my wife 3 that we got to take home since they can’t reuse them.
Bidets can generally also be used for lady parts, but it isn’t just for that. In the link, it does call itself “butt shower”.
Yeah, but this “portable bidet” is literally the exact same product that has been marketed towards post-partum women in the US. I mean that literally, it’s the exact same product made in China, marketed by some slimy western asshole as a “revolutionary portable bidet!!!1!11!”
