I will never be able to own a home because the cost of a down payment goes up with the market, while my saved money’s value stays constant (goes down with inflation). It is literally impossible for me to save it fast enough, even if I saved $1000, which is half of what I pay in rent, per month.

Dasani has water in it.

You may be right, but at the same time, you getting an inheritance makes it a lot easier for your kids to get one too some day.

No, not voltage, current.

Clever.

More like having a phone shoved to your face to see a meme that is mildly entertaining at best.

It’s probably cheap soft steel made in China. You’re probably fine.

12.5 millidrivers.

That’s more than 3 cars. They will have to take turns, or share.

“When others kid me about being bald, I simply tell them that the way I figure it, the good Lord only gave men so many hormones, and if others want to waste theirs on growing hair, that’s up to them.”

-John Glenn

I’ve seen signs like that on the bridge from Virginia to Maryland. It makes sense though, it can be very dangerous with a large speed differential on that particular bridge. It’s kind of a scary bridge. My ex-wife refused to drive on it.

Of course!

Unless something glitches out and you end up being born on December 31, 1969.

Really? You mean you weren’t born in 1900 like I was?

Just make some shit up. You worked at McDonald’s in East Hanover New Jersey in 1976. You made $24 per hour and you approved of the CEO.

Would you like an EXTRA BIG ASS TACO???

If you need a speculum, you’ve already gone too far.