cassie 🐺

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not OP, but I’m in two minds about it. I don’t really care to step in on caitlyn’s behalf, she can kick rocks for all I care. and I don’t think the intent of the post was hateful, but whenever a trans person does something bad and newsworthy, deadnames start to come out and even if it’s directed at someone I actively despise it still sucks to read. revoking someone’s chosen name out of personal disgust is just something we deal with irl a lot. it’s a similar kind of ick as when a female politician does something reprehensible and the discourse gets flooded by a bunch of people crudely commenting on her appearance.

eta: with a very minor change this same exact point could be made without deadnaming her, so to me it’s uncomfortable and unnecessary.

astrology nft or son daughter?

I’m of the opinion both violent and nonviolent means are probably necessary and there’s plenty of nonviolent means of engagement. no war has been fought without support from somewhere, whether that’s a national war machine or the supporting element of an insurgency. there’s always logistics, resources, and well organization that has to occur.

I’m in no condition to fight myself, but over the coming decades I’m gonna have to be thinking about how much violence I’m comfortable being around and how much we can support people in the thick of it. violence is definitely present already in day to day life, but it’s more of an orphan-crushing-machine kind of violence that feels more normal.

It sucks because I know a lot of people referred to as SJWs, myself among them sometimes, and my read is that what pisses people off about them is not exclusive to minorities or the left wing, but the label tends to just apply to people advocating for the oppressed, and the behavior often comes from pain and vulnerability.

A lot of marginalized people lack the space irl to be politically active in a meaningful way. This goes double if you’re trans or closeted or showing up irl is dangerous in any way. Online, you have a platform and can speak your truth, but that’s about it. Social media platforms are incentivized to put a bunch of chuds you don’t agree with in front of you to keep you engaged, and so people end up angrier and angrier, stuck constantly responding to bigotry but never able to actually do much about it, or even hold a good faith conversation. Pet peeves become big sore spots because people keep poking at them and it feels like there’s nothing that can be done to change how anyone feels. Small disagreements over language become big blowouts because it’s probably the tenth time it’s happened today and it might not feel like anyone’s on your side.

Funny enough the person I know who fits this description the most is a right-wing incel, marginalized in some ways due to neurodivergence. He’s prone to big conspiratorial blowouts at the mere mention of climate change or queer people because he sees it as necessary to “educate” people. I don’t think most would call him an SJW yet his engagement with politics and the ways in which he pisses people off are exactly the same.

The way I see it is that tradition is working pretty damn well on the whole. People are producing kids just fine, taking care of them as they grow and become adults is the hard part. That lineage you point to is the only reason I’m alive today, yes, but there are a lot of other “only reasons” I’m alive today that happened after I was born, and many of them were very much not from my biological parents.

Personally there was a lot of generational trauma in my upbringing and I don’t wanna pass that on. These days I’ve taken that parental drive and repurposed it toward the adults in my community whose parents have decided to abandon them, usually due to being queer. It’s different than having a parental relationship to a kid, but I’m finding a community guardian role is filling the same emotional need. The people I care for won’t carry my name, but I didn’t even carry my own name lol.

I used to struggle with the fact that nothing I do will likely outlive me, but now I feel it’s just as worthwhile to make the present day better for the people who need it. I’d still love to work with kids, maybe teach or something, but being trans makes many parents less willing to allow their kids to be around me. I might foster someday, it’ll be a challenge but I think it’s something I’d get a lot more out of.

Well yes, but I don’t even necessarily mean a gun :P

Hey don’t underestimate it! If that’s what ya got, lean into it if you need to. If you can be quick on your feet and convince someone you’re not worth the trouble that can already keep you out of danger. You can always pick up a more physical weapon later, or that just might not be your thing, you’ll figure what works for you.

Yeah, I feel much the same. Shit happens sometimes and it’s good to be prepared. That goes for situations where civilization is collapsing and also in day to day life too. “Preppers” are so hyper fixated on one particular hyper-individual fantasy outcome. The merits of, say, integrating into a mutual aid network are completely missed.

It’s always so much more useful to have AND KNOW WHERE every one-off necessity you might need is. A flashlight and spare batteries. First aid supplies. Spare medication. Superglue. A good utility knife. Emergency bedding. Enough shelf stable food for a few days. Some card games to pass the time. A few creature comforts that are easy to keep on hand. An appropriate weapon you practice with regularly. Some space an unhoused friend could crash for a week.

You get whatever you can together and organized and then you SHARE IT, because these things will all solve day to day problems for people in your life who maybe don’t have them on hand. And then you pay attention to other needs that come up and make small additions so you’re prepared for the needs of people you care about. And then boom there you go you’ve done actual fucking preparation! And get to sleep a little easier knowing you’re ready for a lot more that life could throw at you.

Margaret Killjoy has a great podcast on effective preparation that comes from a very practical community readiness perspective. Definitely worth a listen. Live Like The World Is Dying

“hey wanna come hang out this weekend?” “sorry but-”

it’s true and honestly really inconvenient. I keep trying to kiss my gf but we’re always interrupted by tornado sirens. How are we supposed to groom any kids into our satanic sex cult under these conditions??

Climate Change Any% (Cheats Enabled) Speedrun [WR]

<3

furries get a lot of psychological safety out of embracing animalistic traits in all contexts. Speech is extremely difficult for me and being able to “awooo arf x3 wuf bark!” my way through normal day to day conversations with partners is such an inexplicable relief that I hope people with a passing understanding of neurodivergence can empathize.

For as beneficial as these things are in normal day to day life, it would in fact be far weirder if it didn’t extend to the bedroom too. Like play-gnawing a partner to say “I love you” and then getting to the bed with them and just saying “ok for this one thing in particular I am a normal human who doesn’t howl!!!”

That would be fucking weird right?

I’m gonna copy another comment I made on this post since it’s the best thing I think I can say about it. But just know I once felt as you do and probably still would if my sister wasn’t a furry.

I think the kink and fursuit parts are what most people understand about furries because that’s the most signal boosted and bizarre parts about it. However, furries often have other things that really attach them to it, and the kink is a further expression of that.

For a lot of people, neurodivergence is a core feature. I struggle with speech a lot. I’m learning ASL but few people speak it. The flexibility to communicate in howls, barks and yips on occasion is extremely helpful. The furry community is full of people who just get this and will treat me very normally when I’m nonverbal. The scared kid in me still expects to be hit for disobedience, so it’s incredibly healing.

Some folks who like fursuits like them because they present a barrier and literal mask that helps them feel safe and protected from bad sensory experiences in public. Some attach themselves into a fursona character and find a way to express parts of themselves they couldn’t elsewhere. My sister describes her fursona as a manifestation of her inner child unburdened by abuse, and made the character female years before she worked out she was trans.

When you consider how much kink and trauma go hand in hand, how much furries lean on their identity as a way to feel safe engaging with others, and how much genuine joy people find in their fursona, the kink makes a whole lot more sense. It’s less about being attracted to “rejected Disney mascots” specifically as it is about the comfort and safety a rejected Disney mascot persona can bring to people who need it. For as much as it’s helpful in the outside world, it would in fact be weirder for none of that to come into the bedroom too.

It’s about who you love, not just who you have sex with. Two women who are asexual (don’t experience much in the way of sexual pleasure) who have a long term committed romantic relationship may not technically be “homosexual”, but they are definitely seen and treated as such. And I think the term “gay” very comfortably applies.

phobia of neurodivergent people as well, I think. A lot of the things people find weird and offputting are just like… autism or something.

I think the kink and fursuit parts are what most people understand about furries because that’s the most signal boosted and bizarre parts about it. However, furries often have other things that really attach them to it, and the kink is a further expression of that.

For a lot of people, neurodivergence is a core feature. I struggle with speech a lot. I’m learning ASL but few people speak it. The flexibility to communicate in howls, barks and yips on occasion is extremely helpful. The furry community is full of people who just get this and will treat me very normally when I’m nonverbal. The scared kid in me still expects to be hit for disobedience, so it’s incredibly healing.

Some folks who like fursuits like them because they present a barrier and literal mask that helps them feel safe and protected from bad sensory experiences in public. Some attach themselves into a fursona character and find a way to express parts of themselves they couldn’t elsewhere. My sister describes her fursona as a manifestation of her inner child unburdened by abuse, and made the character female years before she worked out she was trans.

When you consider how much kink and trauma go hand in hand, how much furries lean on their identity as a way to feel safe engaging with others, and how much genuine joy people find in their fursona, the kink makes a whole lot more sense. It’s less about being attracted to “rejected Disney mascots” specifically as it is about the comfort and safety a rejected Disney mascot persona can bring to people who need it. For as much as it’s helpful in the outside world, it would in fact be weirder for none of that to come into the bedroom too.

I like the word “burgerpunk” to describe our dystopia not as neon lights and cool sexy cyborgs but more the aesthetic of a DoorDash ad.