Loads of classics in this thread, worth bookmarking to revisit later. Let me add one of my own that I haven’t seen mentioned:

Babe: Pig in the City (1998) - The first movie I saw in the theater by myself, because nobody could be arsed to come along. In the end I was glad, because I cried so much.

This is a funny distraction and prelude to the inevitable gutting of clean water regulations that he plans to do. Reminds me of the stunt pulled by the inventor of leaded gasoline and real-life Captain Planet villain Thomas Midgley (seriously, look him up) when he tried, unsuccessfully, to assure the public that TEL was safe by huffing it for a minute and pouring it over himself:

“On October 30, 1924, Midgley participated in a press conference to demonstrate the apparent safety of TEL, in which he poured TEL over his hands, placed a bottle of the chemical under his nose, and inhaled its vapor for sixty seconds, declaring that he could do this every day without succumbing to any problems.” [Wikipedia link]

Naw. I’m this fucking old:

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DVI – sure, but if you think 1080p over VGI looks perfect you should probably get your eyes checked.

Just order your maid to dust it twice daily with a feather duster, duh

Left: useless because it’s ugly as hell and won’t fit in anywhere. Right: useless because it falls apart if you sneeze at it.