Brilliant! We need to spread this message so us Pineapple Pizza lovers wont be so hated.

38 year old here checking in with “Butts” for his latest playthrough

This is actually pretty accurate.

I got the idea to turn this into a creepy pasta.

I stared at the river with its clear clean water and my sandpaper tongue swept across my chapped lips. I was thirsty but I couldn’t give in. Not yet.

We still had a full day of travel before we got behind the gun towers of the next city. Their high walls and fields of land mines were the only real protection from the Warminder. We couldn’t risk refreshing ourselves out in the open like this. But the temptation was there.

I longed to jump into the water and drink my fill. The hydration gel packs we were alotted to keep us functioning between safe zones just didn’t cut it. Maybe I could just get a mouthful. A mouthful wouldn’t hurt would it?

Before I could move there was movement to my left. Someone had lost control before I had a chance to. And now he was running straight into the water and plunging his head below the surface and taking in deep gulps of water.

The rest of us hesitated and exchanged glances. The only sound was the splashing and slurping of water. A heartbeat later and 2 more ran for the water. They ran and fell face first and began drinking.

A feeling if anxiety shot through me. Was it safe? Could the Warminder see us? Was the water as refreshing as it looked?

I dropped my pack and stumbled towards the water falling on my knees at the edge of it. I cupped my hands and sunk them beneath the surface and began to raise pure beautiful water to my lips. My lips ached, my tongue beckoned, my heart raced, but that’s when I heard it.

Oh No!

I tried to shout but my throat was too dry. I sprawled away from the water. There were arms and hands grabbing me, pulling me back to safety, away from the water. Then everything happened all at once.

The Warminder was there. A wall of jagged red bricks that jutted out in at terrible angles had already encompassed the first man. I saw the terror in his eyes before the last brick slid in sealing his fate. Another had been close but got sandwiched between bricks as walls were built lightning quick. Fingers and arms stuck out from the walls showing last ditch efforts to cling to life and escape the wrath of the Warminder. All that was left was the sounds of muffled screams.

7 people were lost to the thirst that day. I was almost one of them. And I will never forget the evil grin of that terrible creature, the Warminder.

Yeah no I hate that song.

You had me in the first half, I’m not going to lie.

I’m so glad someone else made this joke so i couldn’t.

Thank you for your sacrifice.

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if we would just chuck woodchucks?