What about Dr Fishman from Arrested Development?

It’s 100% a lose-lose situation no matter how you chop it up, so if I can at least get some Betelgeuse-level of affection from the designated House slut in the meantime, it’ll dull the pain otherwise.

Seat #9 - at least I could get a handie from BoBo after a few in-flight vodkas…

There’d be hair restoration & ED specialized wizards within a year.

Here’s another example of a fuckwit “celebrity” who just couldn’t keep their shit opinions to themselves & now they’re going to get absolutely drug for the next few months, their lives (hopefully) turned upside down.

Hope that RNC check was enough, burnt jizzbag

Southwest Airlines be like…

Welp, when your self-identity is directly correlated to your political beliefs & said beliefs are inherently hateful & divisive against minorities, it’s pretty tough to be confidently open about your “real you”

Big bunch of repressed & depressed dads who are taking advantage of their time away from the fam…

Well, good- I sure as hell wasn’t going to vote for a filthy, slimy criminal with a drug problem

It’s more efficient that way, eliminating steps and whatnot

Somebody actually woke up one morning & thought, “Man, I know everyone’s convinced Dolly’s such a great person… how can I quickly cement that idea even further publicly & make myself look like an even bigger douche at the exact same time?!”

“Gotcha bitch!”

It’s so realistic

Guys? Where? This is a photo of floating hi-viz vests, isn’t it?

It’s almost as if he’s doing mental gymnastics to avoid coming to the obvious conclusion… who’d ever do that about their political beliefs?!

Except Panera’s not even in the same league when it comes to completely unnecessary deaths… religion/ church has millennia & millions up on Panera.

Edit: Panera also has far less sweaty-palmed, Father Feelgood kiddie-diddling accusations as well.