The fact you said “a dick” and not “my dick” 🤨

I woke up yesterday at 10pm and am still awake 14 hours later. No I don work shifts, I just got high and fell asleep on the couch after work.

He absolutely did and the thought of him just casually bikong away from an Assassination is just too fucking funny.

From what I’ve heard NYPD cops are useless anyway

Who would win?

43 billion dollar

One bikey boy

So I‘m a bit ootl here and I‘m trying to understand what so tell if I‘m wrong, but from what I understand this guy shot this CEO of a million dollar health insurance and just fucking biked away?

Edit: What a fucking legend

Me looking in the oven if my pizza is done, but I’m still the only one who’s baked.

What’s a Cimproter?

I have a MagLite 3D and this is so accurate

Ugh, if most of my shit would actually run on Linux I would’ve switched years ago…

I‘m multiple times on both ends.

The only balance I have in my life.

What kinda features do you honestly expect? Phones can basically already do everything these days. Of course the most noteable difference is CPU speed but you don’t need a new one for that every year, or do you upgrade your PC as soon as a new CPU or graphics card hit the market?

Yes it is, I fucking hate autumn and winter.

I recently got a one shoulder top that I’m wearing at home, does that count?

At least wash your car if you’re taking her out

What a shitload of fuck

It’s ok, this a safe space.

Just run me over with a bus or something idk JUST MAKE IT STOP!

Incorrect.

The US are 50 failed states.

How is standing in traffic a real thing? Mfer just pass everyone on your bike!