Once Pringles died, Wagner lost its pipeline of strategic hotdogs. Morale collapsed and losses ensued.

Vance likely deviated from the tour to make love to his dolphin girlfriend (boyfriend?) and plot an escape, The Deep style. I just hope those star-crossed lovers’ journey doesn’t end in a similar tragedy.

What happens behind closed doors between a man, a dolphin, a couch, several firearms, and a copy of Mein Kampf is personal and private.

Gay people? Oh no, that’s not a thing. Maybe if men had the smooth, supple feel of Corinthian leather, I would understand.

Beautiful sword, but looking at it gives me the strangest urge to carve runes into my skin.

Harris should bring Mattis in to the administration in some capacity. He’s smart, universally respected, and the guy bleeds red, white, and blue.

And make sure at least one person in your future gang is a really good cook. You want your dumpster stew to be as close to edible as possible.

Let’s be sure not to vote so President Trump can help the people of Palest… wait… oh that’s right. Trump was asking why all of Gaza hasn’t already been leveled and all the Palestinians genocided months ago.

Trump thinks Netanyahu is being too soft on Palestinians.

Obsessing about what ifs to the point that it blocks your brain from actual problem solving is among the worst ways to handle stress.

Think critically and discern baseless fears from actual concerns.

“You heard me right. I’m ordering a strike on Mar a Lago and the Supreme Court. Official acts, motherfuckers.”

8 hours of dailies 5 days a week is the most ridiculous and pointless grind I’ve ever seen.

The premium capitalist health insurance plan- extend your lifespan through mindless servitude.

That’s clearly how our hunter-gatherer bodies and minds were supposed to work.

“From hell’s heart, I stab at thee. For hate’s sake, I spit my first unbanned keystroke at thee.”

Fred Hampton. They got his head of security to drug him, then came in on him with his pregnant girlfriend asleep next to him and murdered him. His tombstone is all shot up, because cops go there to shoot at it.

He was the Illinois chairman of the black panther party, and his focus was bringing all races together to fight economic injustice. That, and educating everyone about the class warfare being waged by the extraction class.

Edit: typo

Wait a fucking minute! Is the guy who posted this a Democratic socialist or a social democrat? I need to know before I react!

I am a leftist by nature, but I can’t get involved in all their madness. The pettiness and bickering is absolutely ridiculous. Quit smelling your own farts and actually fucking organize.

“It’s an official act, Jack. And I’ll fucking do it again.”

t. Dark Brandon

Just give them all the gross, sweaty, smelly sex they think they’re owed for talking to you. That’s how they see it, and they certainly aren’t going to change. If anything, they’ll get worse.

Or maybe rethink who you’re in bed with.

At least he was curious enough to step out of his bubble for a day and find out what it’s like. That’s better than the rest of them.

At the conclusion of a satisfying meal, Americans are expected to fire their Breakfast Guns into the air in the parking lot. It’s considered courteous, and it signals to others where a good breakfast can be found.

Cruelty is the point profitable.

Don’t knock a deep dive into the Battle of Midway until you’ve tried it.