Malgas

But only some children get jam actually pumped into their homes.

The war on Christmas must not end until Christmas ends its illegal occupation of November.

My mom didn’t hyphenate, but she does include her maiden name when writing her full name, after her middle name. It never even occurred to me that that’s uncommon.

Love Demetri Martin.

But the real story is weirder: the color is named after the fruit. Prior to the 16th century it was “yellow-red”.

Also carrots were not commonly orange when oranges arrived in Europe. The carrots we’re used to were hybridized from the earlier yellow, red, and purple varieties in the late 18th century.

My favorite version was when Michael used it: “It’s a human insult. It’s devastating. You’re devastated right now.”

What’s wrong with that cat?

That’s not the half of it:

Hofstadter’s Law: It always takes longer than you think, even when you take into account Hofstadter’s Law.

Do you also believe that the Democratic Republic of North Korea is a democracy just because the name says so?

I used to use a system that was perfectly happy to let you use a semicolon when setting the password, but then login would fail if you did.

To be fair, you were only off by a week.

Yeah I’ve definitely heard “up to [amount] or more” used in advertising. Which is just completely meaningless.

No, it’s the national symbol of Ukraine.

Fascists love to try to co-opt national symbolism, and sometimes they succeed, but ceding ownership of a 1000 year old symbol (it was used as a seal in Kievan Rus) because some assholes adopted it in 1993 is just letting the fascists win.

If not, that would go some way to explaining why they seem to be so fascinated by them.

The proof that it is probably not possible ever is that metric time was already adopted during the French Revolution, during the period when they were metricising everything else, and even they decided that it wasn’t worthwhile.

“I once drove past some elephants in a Prius. How they got into a Prius I’ll never know.”

(Apologies to Groucho Marx.)

Also “doctor” means teacher. The specific term for someone who practices medicine is “physician”.

Connect very slightly cuts off the bottom of the image for me.